'I'm on the train...'

Travelling up on the train from Liverpool Street to Colchester yesterday, I was able to make some more observations for my 'Commuting' chapter of Mud & The City: Dos and Don'ts for Townies in the Country. A young guy sitting opposite me chatted until Manningtree Station (a good 40 minutes) to his mate, describing in great detail the plans he had for carpets, building works etc for a new house he was moving in to with, apparently, seven other blokes. None of the rest of us could even think, let alone, read the paper or concentrate on some work while he was banging on. But we couldn't help smiling when at the end he was heard to say into his handset, with some force, 'But look, mate, don't tell ANYONE about this, yeah?'.